Preparing for Christmas

Tis the season!! So that's what people say. I find this time of year to be insanely busy. I have Christmas shopping to do, Christmas parties to attend, Christmas baking to complete, Christmas cards to send out, Christmas decorating to hang, and then the regular normal everyday activities.

To be honest, I am not feeling the Christmas spirit as I used to. It's really quite sad, but I have the same feeling I had last year, if Christmas just passed by and slept through it I can't say that I would miss it. It's a terrible feeling to have, absolutely terrible because I used to be the girl that loved Christmas. I have a new baby to celebrate this season of giving with and the things I usually do to get into to festive mood is not working. I find this terribly sad.

I am not unaware of why Christmas has taken a not so festive turn, I know it stems back to the events of last year. Last year on December 8 my father passed away, it left a very dampened mood over Christmas. I would have voted to cancel Christmas, but for Chandler I went through with it. I know tomorrow is going to be a difficult day for me, I am working to keep my schedule absolutely full so I don't have time to dwell on what has occurred. I miss my father daily and when I look at Chandler and Leigham I miss him even more. I miss that he won't get to see his grandchildren, and that he can't celebrate with me the accomplishments I have made. It definitely puts a dark cloud over Christmas.

I need to find a way to celebrate Christmas that is different than I used to, I think that may be the only way to rebuild the Christmas spirit in myself. So in keeping with my Pay it forward challenge I started thinking of doing little things. Last Saturday Chandler had a soccer game, we arrived at the Collicut early and were ordering food. A little girl came up to the till and asked if she could have a cup for one of her teammates that forgot their water bottle. The girl work told her it would cost her ten cents ( WHAT?!?!) The girl left without her cup because she did not have the ten cents. I told the lady behind the counter to give me another bottle of water, as Chandler had forgotten his bottle of water as well. I then went and found that little girl and gave her the bottle of water. I told her to take this gesture of kindness and pass it forward to other people.

It felt good to do something nice and maybe by doing these little expressions of charity I will build up my Christmas spirit and have something to celebrate this year. My celebration will be teaching my sons to give of themselves this holiday season as it isn't about what you get but what you give of yourself that makes this season so special.


  1. She actually tried to charge a little girl ten cents? What a cow.


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