This World, My Depression

The title of this post is a bit deceiving, I don't feel like I suffer from depression, but I do at times battle with feeling depressed.  I've never had to have medication to balance my moods, but I've had counselling and I'm a chronic over sharer.... possibly a reason for my having a blog.... Think on that one.

Throughout my life I have felt greatly. I have a lot of empathy for others and can cry for others misfortunes as honestly and thoroughly as I do for my own.  I've been accused of having a soft heart, because I cry over even what to some seem like little things, but it's because how completely I feel things.  I don't know if that will make sense to everyone but it's the only way I can explain it.

And to be honest I've always been this way, the silliest things can make me cry.  I can't tell you how many movies have made me cry and some that are completely surprising.  It's not because of post natal hormones either because I've been this way forever.  My grandma tells the story how she was watching me one day and I started crying in the living room. Grandma came in and asked me why I was crying and I said because the commercials are gone and asked if they would come back.  Seriously, I cried over the commercials ending.  Every year I would travel to California to see my dad and every year I'd cry at the airport as I left my mom and siblings behind and every year I'd cry when I left California and my dad and friends behind. Without fail, I'd be sobbing for the first hour of my flight home.  One time I cried on my way to Vegas with my sister because Lil Man was a year old and it was the first time I was leaving him.

I have cried in Harry Potter Movies, PS I love you, any Nicholas Spark books made into a movies and so many novels too.  I mean I had the ugly cry in Marian Keyes' novel Anyone out there.  I've even cried at some videos on Facebook like the Korean commercial where the dad calls the mom because the babies crying and after holding the phone to the baby and the baby not settling until the dad picks him up to cuddle him, yup this girl sobbed.  My friend put a quote up on Facebook about being young mom, it said "I'm a young mom so I could love you just a little longer" and I cried, I felt so deeply about that quote that my eyes welled up and I thought about how much I love my kids.

But what's gotten me lately is the news. Now I don't watch the news because I think like breeds like and the news is all bad so all it brings forward is bad stuff.  But I've heard some news recently, I mean you have to live under a rock with no electronics to avoid the news completely and obviously I don't. So I've heard about the Russia Ukraine situation, and then ISIS which is just horrific.  And my mom said that my grandma said this was what it was like before WWII and she thinks we will have another world war happening soon.  Just the thought of our world spiralling into another world war makes me so sad, then add to that that my oldest is 15 almost 16 and if things don't end in 2 years he could be drafted!!! Well now I'm just beside myself!!  I'm literally tearing up as I write this.

Why can't we just get along, let bygones be bygones, accept others and stop trying to enforce our views on people who don't want them.  I'm not just saying this about Western Society either, the other side the middle east etc need to take the same thing.

But it's all a power struggle, and the innocent are the ones that pay for the actions of a few. there was a video from the about a rescue of a 2 week old baby in a bombed out building.  Why did that baby have to be bombed? That baby hasn't done anything and it was almost a casualty of war.

So yes when I think of the state of the world I'm depressed.  What do I do about it, I work hard in my world to be nice to everyone I meet. I have standards and I hold people to them, I don't let people walk over me but I do allow them to be who they want to be, and I don't need to judge them on their choices because it's their life and I can't make their choices.  Do I want to move to an island somewhere far away?  sometimes I do, but I know that's not feasible.

So I put a challenge out to you, all my readers, if you feel the same as I do, but feel powerless to make a change in the world, let's do this. Let's be kind to everyone we meet. If we don't agree with them, let's not condemn them but allow them the courtesy to have their own view as to accept that their truth is not our truth.  It won't be easy, but kindness needs to be a wave a movement, and then maybe it will help alter our world for the positive, alter our world and make an impact on the larger world and help stop us from always making the same mistakes.

I think it's time to make a movement, it's time to foster change, I'm going to do it in my little corner and if I can pass it on to others and they pass it on and so forth, then maybe we can change the world. I will be the change I wish to see in the world!!


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